The Lorelais resolve
by Mrs Dionysius O'Gall
Summary: It's time for New Year's resolutions.


"You go first," I say to my kid.

"No, age before beauty," she smugly replies.

I stick my tongue out at her.

Every year, I make a bunch of New Year's Resolutions. Every year, I realize how unrealistic they are even before the New Year dawns. But somehow, the experiences of the past year have me thinking about making more realistic ones. Ones that I have at least a freakin' chance of achieving.

So many good and bad things happened this year. It began so happily, then there came the breakup. Then we reconciled, but Rory had her crisis. And I asked Luke to marry me, and wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles, he said yes. But the summer was an odd mixture of happiness and pain. Then Rory came back and the house is renovated and we have Paul Anka and we're so happy. We're getting married, I'm going to have the whole package...

So this year, the kid and I are gonna make a list of resolutions, and exchange them, to celebrate being a family again. And we're gonna give each other copies of our lists, and check up on each other during the year. We've been sitting at the kitchen table for a good hour writing our lists.

I pick up my glass, and drum against it with my fork.

"Are you ready for the reading of the resolutions?" I inquire.

Rory giggle. "You sound like you're about to have the airing of the Festivus grievances."

I giggle back, then turn serious. "So here are my resolutions," I solemnly intone. "And no interrupting during the reading of the resolutions."

"Ok, just as long as you don't interrupt me!" Rory responds.

"Ahem. One. I, Lorelai Gilmore, soon to be Lorelai Danes, resolve to spend at least as much, if not more, time laughing in 2006 as I spent crying in 2005."

Rory looks at me, a stricken expression on her face.

"Hon, no, not because of you. Well not entirely. This one is because Luke and I were broken up in 2005."

A smile returns to her face.

I clear my throat. "Two. I resolve to spend more dinners sitting at a table with Luke, without the TV on, having what he calls a 'civilized meal like civilized people. Three. I resolve to cut myself some slack, and give myself time to catch my breath every now and then, and not work so hard."

That one is met with a vigorous, approving nod!

"Four. I resolve to take as many bubble baths as I want." I grin and Rory grins back at me.

"Five." Rory's gonna love this one. "I resolve to do one thing of his choice that Luke asks of me to improve my health. Because I want to be his baby Mama."

I quickly continue before Rory can insert a requisite 'Dirty'  
"Six. I resolve to get working on making that baby the day after we get married."

I watch her expression. She seems pleased with this one.

"Seven," I continue. "I, Lorelai Gilmore, resolve to eat chocolate whenever I want to eat chocolate, and not feel bad about it or let Luke make me feel bad about it."

Rory giggles.

"Eight. I resolve to take care of Paul Anka. Make sure he doesn't feel neglected."

I quickly rush into the next one, because it's dirty. "Nine. I resolve to kiss Luke at least three times a day, and to think dirty thoughts about him at least once a day."

"What, Paul Anka comes before Luke?" Rory interjects.

"No butting in, remember?" I remind her. "Besides, these are in no particular order. So, moving right along, number ten. I resolve to let Luke know when he's driving me crazy."

That elicits a quirky eyebrow-raise.

"Eleven. I resolve to let him off the hook when the time is right. I waited a long time for him and there's nothing he could do except like be an axe murderer, that I couldn't forgive him for."

Rory nods her head in understanding.

"Twelve. I resolve to let Rory make her own decisions unless she asks me for input."

Oh my god, I think Rory looks like she's going to cry now.

"Thirteen," I say, "I resolve not to let Luke's feelings about Christopher get to me." My voice quakes just a tiny bit. "Because he's your father," I add.

"Fourteen. I resolve to be satisfied with my body and face even though I'm getting close to the big 4-0, and remember that Luke loves me the way I am."

Rory nods her head again, this time vigorously and with a smile.

"Fifteen. I resolve to do at least one thing that Luke wants to do, that I might not want to, per week. Wait, maybe I should change that to per month."

Rory shoots a dagger-like glare at me.

"Okay, per week it stays. Sixteen. I resolve to stay in touch with my friends. And seventeen: I resolve to go to each town meeting. What happens there, though, I can't be held accountable for."

I smirk and Rory smirks back in understanding.

"Eighteen. I resolve to get the Inn involved in being charitable to the less fortunate."

I'm a little worried about the next few, and decide to talk really fast.

"Nineteen. I resolve to be gracious, patient, and generous when around my mother and father. Add Christopher to that one. And twenty, I resolve to forgive my parents. Or at least try to. Add Christopher to that as well."

"That's quite a list," Rory comments.

"Wait, wait, I'm not done yet. I've got, umm, two more."

"That's twenty-two," Rory says, indignantly. "Hey wait…" she adds as she begins to write.

"Hey, no fair, no adding any more to your list," I protest and jerk the paper out from under her. I wave it in the air until she grabs it back from me.

"Well don't you want to hear my other two?" I wheedle. "One's even kinda dirty," I tempt.

"Ok," she grudgingly agrees.

"Twenty-one. I resolve to remember my dreams, and make the dirty, I mean good ones, a reality. And twenty-two: I resolve to have faith in Luke and our relationship, even when it gets hard. Hee!"

"That's an important one, OK, the two extra ones can stay," Rory softly says.

"Okey-dokey," I sigh, "Your turn."

Rory takes a moment to look over her paper, then begins.

"Number one…"

Before she can continue, I stop her.

"Wait, you forgot to solemnly swear."

She sighs. "OK, I Rory Gilmore…"

I cough.

"Oh, right," she continues, "I, Lorelai Gilmore…"

I smile approvingly.

"I hereby resolve to enjoy being back at school."

I smile and nod.

"Number two. I resolve to go to Friday Night Dinners even though I don't have to, thanks to Dad."

My smile sort of freezes on my face, until I remember my number nineteen.

"Number three. I resolve to participate in at least one extracurricular, non Yale Daily News activity each semester. Note: try to have fun?"

Leave it to my kid to have to remind herself to have fun.

"Number four. I resolve to enjoy riding in Logan's car even though it guzzles gas."

She would have to mention him…

"Number five," she continues her list, "I resolve to exercise twice a week."

"Because I am such a couch potato," she hastily adds as she sees my frown.  
"Number six. I resolve to take care of myself emotionally. Number seven. I resolve to ask my Mom and Stepfather for advice before making big decisions."

Stepfather? The tears rush into my eyes as I realize she's talking about Luke. Luke's going to be someone's stepdad.

"Number eight. I resolve not to let my mom, grandma and grandpa get to me."

She says that one in a tiny voice. I try not to visibly wince at being lumped in with my parents.

"Number nine. I resolve to tolerate Doyle."

There must be a good story there. I make a mental note to ask her about it sometime later.

"Number ten. I resolve to do at least one totally spontaneous thing a week."

It pains me to hear my baby have to resolve to be spontaneous.

"Number eleven. I resolve to finish both semesters at Yale."

The tears threaten again. She senses this, and rushes on with the next ones.

"Number twelve. I resolve to visit my little sister every month. Number thirteen. I resolve to talk to my Dad every week, and number fourteen: I resolve to express gratitude to Dad for sharing his money with me."

Those are all good. Family's important. I try to convey approval with my expression.

"Number fifteen. I resolve to do community service."

Now I quirk an eyebrow at her--I thought she was done with her community service hours.

"Mom, it's just that I learned a lot about people, helping others…" she explains.

I'm so proud of my kid.

"Number sixteen. I resolve to not expect myself to be a straight A student."

Another one that brings pain to me, because there were so many years that I never had to wonder what her grades would be like…

"Number seventeen. I resolve to get to know Luke better."

Does this kid want to corner the market on Kleenex today?

"Because he's always been there, but I didn't notice him as much as I should have," Rory explains.

I beam back at her through my tears. I'm glad I'm marrying such a wonderful man.

"Number eighteen. I resolve to look at each challenge as an opportunity."

That sounds nice and Yale-worthy.

"Number nineteen. I resolve to not let the opinion of one person keep me from fulfilling my dreams."

Oh, Rory…

"Just one more," she adds, "Number twenty. I Lorelai Gilmore, do hereby resolve to tell those I love that I do love them."

My tears continue to flow.

"I love you mom," Rory whispers.

I think I am full-on sobbing now, and draw my wonderful kid into a hug. "You have no idea, kid," I say, as she hugs me in return. 


End file.
